I used to watch CSI pretty regularly on TV. In one episode, Grisham and his team were called in to investigate the disappearance of a young girl, probably around the age of 10 or 11. She had, as I recall, an older sister (or friend?) and an older brother. The brother had an illness that required periodic blood transfusions, and the family was having problems finding a donor whose blood was a match.
The older sister told the investigators that the girl had been abducted by someone in a car. This was, in time, proven to be false. It was also revealed that the parents had chosen to have the girl in hopes that her blood type would match her brother’s. She was the donor, and periodically had to give her blood to keep her brother alive. In time, Grisham discovered that the girl was dead, and his investigations revealed the brother as the killer.
In the last scene of the TV drama, Grisham finds the boy in a church, alone in the quiet. He sits beside him and the boy tells his story. He saw how his sister suffered each time she had to give blood, and how she was becoming weaker all the time. He could not continue to take her blood anymore and he knew his parents would not stop. To end the horrible situation, he killed her. He knew he had done wrong and he knew Grisham was there to arrest him; he accepted the situation. He said to Grisham: “I know you don’t believe in God, Mr. Grisham, but you do his work.” The look of surprise on Grisham’s face, and maybe even discomfort, was interesting to see.
This scene has stayed with me for several years. I find myself remembering it and the boy’s words and thinking about them, puzzling over them. I find myself thinking, God works through everyone, even those who do not believe. We can’t really know how God is working. We can’t judge. We have to let God lead; sometimes in order to follow we need to wait and see.
I’m not sure I really understand. To me, faith is a life journey, often with detours and doubts, and in the end, sometimes all I can do is trust God. Isn’t that trust what faith really is? This journey of faith is an interesting journey, often joyful, even with the doubts and uncertainties. It’s odd, but it gives me a great sense of satisfaction to think that my whole lifetime will not be long enough to explore my faith questions. Every time I think a question is answered, more open up. But I find that I like that. This episode of CSI opened up many thoughts and questions.
You are reading a series of Women's Faith Stories